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Sex Rulez (Don't Touch The Weave)

from Awesome Robot by ASSAULTICA

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lyrics

Sex Rulez (Don't Touch The Weave)

-Verse 1

(Mutz)
See your face in a drunken place, I go in for the kill.
Classy blonde, cherry bomb, spread upon the bar.
Bright red dress made to impress a gentleman like me.
I never knew they made them like you, let's take off and get it on.

(Ken)
She's hypnotized cause I shave my man.
Can't deny the affliction brand.
Barbed wire tattoo on my arm.
Four inches for her sausage wallet.

(Mutz)
Go into your room to invade your womb. The ritual begins.
Flex the guns give a pull and a tug. What happened to your hair?

(Ken)
How'd she deceive a man like me?
Don't you think that I'll pull out now.
Let's act like it never happened.
Like I'm humping Sinead O'Connor

-Chorus 1

Rule 1: Try to make this fun. We're all here to get off.
Rule 2: Take off your shoes. No one wants a bruise.
Rule 3: Don't touch the weave. You might not like what you see.
Rule 4: Unlock the door so it's easy for her to leave.

-Verse 2

(Mutz)
I don't know what I should do. How do I proceed?
Slug a beer, and shed a tear, hope none of my friends see.
This balding burner, wig in hand, begging me to breed.
Close my eyes and go balls deep, we're going to do this thing tonight.

(Ken)
Take a shower, take a shit load of showers.
Got to scrub my 4 inches of power.
It's fucking cool, but it's fucking weird.
Someone get me a fucking beer.

-Chorus

-Break

Use these rulez we've set in stone to reach your ultimate goal.
Always keep them in your mind, and they'll never treat you wrong.
One thing I didn't mention, an oversight in my plans.
Just make sure on your way home the girl is not a man.

-Chorus

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from Awesome Robot, released July 26, 2018

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ASSAULTICA Upper Darby, Pennsylvania

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